Hayden's List of Chapters
1. Adam & Naive
2. Bloody Mary
3. Chilling Procrasturbation
4. We All Walk the Streets
5. Liminality
6. Exit 17
7. A Deathguard for the Atlantic
8. Perspective
9. Genesis
10. When Harry Fucked Sally
11. Fuck Bitches, Get Money
12. The Sun Queen
13. What's in a New York Taco?
14. The Invisible Woman
15. An Intimate God
16. Mrs. Robinson
17. Fuzzy Cuffs
18. Hooker in Vitro
19. A Turning Point
20. What it's like to be the Sun
21. If this is fading...
22. A Mockingbird
23. A Needle in a Haystack
24. All the Best Cowboys have Daddy Issues
25. Mary-onette
26. The Frat Pack
27. Operation Nag Woon
28. Babylonian Captivity
29. Champagne Wishes and Caviar Dreams
30. Revelations- Apocalypse of Hayden
Now I will keep posting excerpts from these chapters along with other stories that Hayden has written/experienced. Feel free to request anything. And don't worry, as soon as I get this tape recording onto my computer I will put it on the site. It's the most disturbing thing I have ever heard. Hopefully, you'll agree.
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My name is Hayden Santiago—that is who I am, but not what I am. My desire to burn and destroy, rape and pillage anything beautiful is rooted so deep that I no longer see the world as abject, ugly, but rather measure everything along a spectrum—a wavelength of beauty...I am salvation without hope. I am death without life. I am pain without purpose. I am here. I am now. I am you. Everything you have experienced before this has meant nothing. Consider this dying.
About Me
Genesis
"As we exit the comfort of the womb, impervious to any worldly influence, we forget this adamantine ideal—morality is relative. Some of us are meant to live lives that kindle in an enclosed fireplace in a desolate cabin deep within the confines of God's greenest pastures, while others are meant to live lives that burn cities, that set those greenest pastures ablaze with such a caustic fury that the cabin metamorphoses from an undisturbed sanctuary into a crude stack of firewood that keeps the embers burning in the hearts of those who execute sentience with such unadulterated élan. I am the latter, and after reading this book your cabin will be but ashes scattering across the surface of your existence. We are all just hardcover books—how long we survive is determined by how strong our spine is. Death for you will be but a puff of wind that makes the candles flicker and the flames grow tall. Death for us will be a squall that shakes the very foundations of the earth, creating tremors that cause massive fault lines to fuck each other with a vehement passion that explodes then subsides and every single candle will go out quietly because the wax has waned. And the actuality of God won't mean shit because it was within all of us. Sometimes we must sacrifice existence for the sake of avoiding extinction." - Hayden Santiago.
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